First Day in Achebe Hall, MOUAU: Sweat, Crowds, and Chaos
10th November, 2014 – Monday, 10:00 AM.
I checked my schedule and saw MTH112—a 100 level course. It was my first lecture day at Michael Okpara University of Agriculture, Umudike (MOUAU), and I wanted to make a statement. After a quick shower, I picked out my favorite shirt. I had to look fresh—it was my university debut, after all.
By 9:00 AM, I was on my way. I arrived at Achebe Hall around 9:17 AM with high expectations. Like many who grew up watching American college movies, I imagined a spacious white lecture hall with tiered seating and full air-conditioning.
Instead? Achebe gave me something… different.
Right at the entrance, a strange smell welcomed me. Within minutes, I was sweating buckets. The stairs were jam-packed—moving up felt like walking through a biblical pilgrimage. When I finally got upstairs, I was drenched in sweat, like I had just taken another bath—this time with steam.
The crowd? Insane. I thought I was at a Drake concert. Finding a seat was like a 6-year-old trying to lift a 55kg barbell—impossible. I gave up. The tiered seating looked decent, almost like a mini performing arts theatre, so I figured I’d stand and just listen. Except… the speakers didn’t work.
Around me, it was madness: students chatting, laughing, phones buzzing with Candy Crush and Subway Surfers. I couldn’t hear a thing. Achebe Hall wasn’t just for lectures—it was prime real estate for “hunting” too, because the ladies? They plenty die, lol.
I started scanning the room instead. MOUAU is full of characters: the serious ‘hypers,’ the fashionistas, and my favorite—the clowns. Their jokes helped distract me from the unbearable humidity.
Two hours in and I’d learned nothing. I was now one with the sweat and heat. At 11:45 AM, the lecturer finally wrapped up and asked for assignment submissions. What followed was chaos—a full-blown stampede. Imagine wildebeests crossing a crocodile-infested river. That’s how it felt.
When I finally escaped, I was drained, soaked, and overwhelmed.
But hey—this was just the beginning. Achebe Hall isn’t all bad, but dear MOUAU, a renovation wouldn’t hurt.
